| The Naked Truth: High price of love | ||||
| HOME
FLASH FIND OUT ALL THE TOP NEWS HOME
HTML BIZ
DIRECTORY CONTACT MORE
MUSIC MESSAGE
BOARD EU
SERVICES |
By Columnist The sisters in the
hood are fond of saying “Romance without finance is a nuisance.”
Masters and Johnson, Kinsley and others who probe into the essence of
romantic relationships have yet to come up with any better way of stating
the salient role funds play in affairs of the heart. Certainly, Valentine’s
Day accentuates the appropriateness of visual demonstrations of affection
that are best done with store-bought items. But so it is with other
special occasions ranging from anniversaries and birthdays to peace
offerings. Making matters worse is
the Masters and Johnson survey finding that most of what couples talk
about behind closed doors make that bedroom doors, revolves around
finance. Money is the number one topic among married couples. Perhaps, the first hit record in the fabled Motown lineage was foretelling when Barrett Strong sang mournfully: “Your love gives me such a thrill, But loving won’t pay my bills! I need money! That’s what I want!” Suffice it to say;
even puppy love is expensive in the present day and age. Long gone are the
days of scribbling poems on tidbits of paper, rolling them into spitballs
and throwing them across the classroom to the object of one’s affection.
Young love has gone high tech and even pre-teens are pressured to have the
right equipment to send tech messages, voice mail and e-mail. The tools of courtship cost a pretty penny and the omnipresent cell phone is basic to existence. The pager, having waxed and waned as the device of choice, is passé but still not free. Conventional dating is a dying art and is fastly being replaced by the rendezvous. That is, “Let’s meet at….” Still, the rendezvous is costly, especially when it is at a restaurant, arcade or shopping mall. Fading into oblivion are the days of meeting in the library, walking in the park, and that exciting adventure of searching for four-leaf clovers on a grassy lawn. Sharing a soda is also a thing of the past. No longer is it chic to have his and her straws in one tall glass of a soft drink. Nowadays, she has to have her own thing and he probably prefers a different flavor. “Two drinks please!” Don’t forget transportation. You have to have access to wheels whether your own or somebody else’s. Nobody walks anymore except inside a shopping mall. Any sighting of a young couple riding a street bus or commuter train should call 911. Surely, one of them is being kidnapped. And if a young couple is spotted in the backseat of a car being driven by one of their parents, they are either coming from jail or going to a funeral. Most of the foregoing applies to young, puppy love where the future is not considered and livelihood is something parents provide. Grown-up relationships rest squarely on financial foundations. One or both parties have to have or appear to have present or future financial moorings. Granted, the initial attraction may be based on looks, personality, or something intangible. Beyond first impressions and any thoughts of a long-term or permanent relationship, are considerations of financial compatibility. Viability and longevity of a relationship are closely tied to financial stability within it. Shaky money very often leads to a shaky relationship. The Naked Truth: Whether young innocent love between starry eyed teens or a serious relationship involving a fully gown couple, money is essential. Maybe, the sisters in the hood know what they are talking about when they chime, “Romance without finance is a nuisance.” Happy Valentine’s Day. _______________________________________________________________________ Dr. Hilliard Lackey is Senior Education Consultant for Young Sanford Marketing and Media Services, 3396 Park Avenue, Memphis, TN 38111. E-mail hlackey@bellsouth.net. |